My mother wants me to make a new xanga because she doesnt like the name of this one.  I can respect that.  So my new xanga is....

mylittleflowerpotdress

Amy and I hung out with Josh and Derek last night.  It was fun.  It always is.  We always do random things.  Like hang out in parking lots.  We tailgated at starbucks, and I Ifigured that would probably be one of the last times we would do that with Amy's truck.  It's kinda sad.

Anyways... I get home.  And I'm happier than ever.  And I try to go to sleep... but I couldnt.  My mind was racing about things like always... so I decided to go back online and my dad woke up and started breathing down my neck because he thinks that I'm putting vulgar on his computer?  I dont get it. So we got in this huge horrible fight.  I knew moving back home wasnt going to do anything for me.  I'm not suprised that they still think I'm a devil child.  I just wish they saw the change in me.  But I guess I'm just gonna have to work harder to prove myself.  I'll do it though. 

My tummy is a twirling again.

My body is totally numb to anything that is depressing.  I cant help but feel happy right now. I just wish it would stay this way.  for awhile.

The beach house was way more fun than I ever thought it was going to be.  It helped me clear a lot of things in my head and taught me a lot actually.  It's kinda weird to think that going away with all of your closest friends for a week could do just a major change in your life.  Not that I've changed or anything... but it really just opened my eyes to the future and stuff.  I dont know... its sounds kinda lame but oh well.  I feel like I've grown up a lot in the past few days.  Like my age is catching up to me.  Although I still feel like I'm 13. 

I had to make a couple rough decisions this week.  But I can tell a major change in my attitude.  And I'm really excited about it. 

I'm free to move around.  I'm free to do whatever I want.  I dont have to be anywhere at anything except for HOME. And thats a pretty good freaking feeling.

I finally got inspired to write.  And I feel a huge writing splurg coming on.  I'm totally stoked for that.  It's gonna be awesome to focus on my music. 

Peacin out for now.